Thank my lucky Tampax that ‘freebleeding’ is a hoax

Man as TamponSo #freebleeding is a hoax. Good. Because my husband and I love tampon sex sometimes. And besides that, I hate it when my ass bleeds all over the sheets.

Yeah, yeah … I know I said that “if you do anal sex right, it doesn’t hurt.” I also said:

There’s no such thing as “100 percent safe sex,” just as there’s no such thing as “100 percent safe chicken salad,” DBTR. … There is only safer sex: use condoms when appropriate, have more sex with fewer partners, get regular STI screenings.

So, occasionally, when my husband shoves a tampon up my ass at my request, I’m thankful for the Superior Absorption with Fluid-Lock Grooves. (Yeah, I admit I prefer o.b. What man doesn’t?) If nothing else, it helps me get my groove on.

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About therealdansavage

I'm the Fake Real Dan Savage. Not to be confused with the Real Fake Dan Savage (who's the real real Dan Savage), the gay anti-bullying activist who likes to bully people who aren't gay or fake. View all posts by therealdansavage

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